If you’ve read the about me section it is not a secret that I am overweight. Unfortunately, it got worse than its ever been in the last few years. Why? I got my masters degree while working full time and my health got pushed even further onto a back burner. I have never been as heavy as I am right now, and with that in mind it is time for me to acknowledge the truth with a heavy heart (pun intended, hey I have to try to have some fun through this) I am three hundred pounds. I am not overweight, I am obese. I’ve known I had a problem and needed to work on it. I didn’t want to acknowledge how bad it was. Do you want to know how you know when its time?
I tried to climb into Zeus’ saddle, which I was able to, but I barely fit in his 16 inch saddle. I managed, but it was a reality check I needed. In the past I could easily squeeze into a 15 inch saddle, though I preferred a 17, still do. I am mad it got to this point, but thankful that I caught it when I did. I am young enough that I have time to do something about it. To start with I need to figure out why.
In the past it had everything to do with when I had time to work out. I never gave myself time to work out even though I am the weird person who loves working out. That hasn’t changed unfortunately now I just have even less time. Now I also have to combat something I have started since I last worked on losing weight. I have started emotion eating. I knew it was happening, but I didn’t know it was causing such an issue.
I had started working on this awhile ago, but I let life get in the way. Life includes my battle for my health, so there is no life getting in the way any longer. I made one post on this long ago, and dropped it. Not again.
I am working with a counselor to improve a few things, but how that impact this: I am working on self care, which for me is working out. I love it, it makes me feel better, and it’s what I need to do for my health.
The emotion eating has to stop. I am working on it, but the small step I’m taking is making the emotion eating be healthier. In the past what I wanted was cheese, carbs, and meat. For me, that used to mean fast food. I’m focusing on healthy swaps for now, I’ll work on eliminating later once I’m successful at swapping. I’m going to work on swapping the cheese was I was using for low fat or portion controlled. For meat I am going to try to use turkey subs or portion control, and for carbs whole grain and limited portion. Where I can avoid emotional eating at all, I will.
I’m going to try to be more consistent at tracking what I eat (I really like my fitness pal). I do it some of the time, but not as well as I’d like to. I may not be perfect, but I’m at least going to be cognizant of what I’m eating.
Last, once I get in a bit of a rhythm I’m going to resume using gym pact. It is an app that essentially is gambling. Nothing more nothing less. You set a goal, and if you meet it you pay nothing. If you don’t, you pay whatever preset amount you chose. It worked before. I will started small and work up to more.